To spend quality time with your kids, you have to put away gadgets and give your undivided attention to them. Here are some tips you should consider in order to have a good talk with your child.
Engage them in Activities
When you are involved in a light activity with your child, your conversation may tend to go deep. Allowing your child to be part of something you like doing maybe a sporting activity, helps them open up to you.
As a parent, taking the extra effort to strengthen the bond with your child (ren) is paramount.
Lead by Example
As an adult, there must be down times for your mobile devices. During family time (Morning Devotion, Dinner etc) the use of mobile devices, if not totally eliminated, should be reduced to the barest minimum and only used when it is urgently necessary.
Monitor When and How Children use their Device
Children will always be children. It is parents’ responsibility to ensure that mobile devices are used for what they have been designed for. Know what your children do with their mobile devices: who they speak with, what is being discussed and when they use their mobile devices. Monitor them to ensure that they do not visit inappropriate sites and that they do not store or upload inappropriate posts with their phones.
In our ever evolving world, especially in the era of mobile devices technology, face to face conversation has become almost impossible and of little importance for many people because they are so attached to their mobile devices. Even when they are in the midst of friends, they seem to care less about group discussions, which might be perceived as offensive, and even their environment because they are so engrossed with their phone(s).
Parents should be aware that every child craves attention.
You may have something very important you are doing with your device but you should not totally ignore your kids, especially when they need your attention, so you do not hurt their emotions unintentionally. To spend quality time with your kids, you have to put away gadgets and give your undivided attention to them. Here are some tips you should consider in order to have a good talk with your child.
Be interested in conversing with them
Try not to force yourself into talking with your kids. One thing that could help you achieve this is your curiosity about them. When you’re interested in knowing more about their activities, you would have a lot of things to talk about.
Ask them questions
This is the first step to take whenever a conversation is about to begin. The questions could be based on anything of interest to them. It could be about what they did at school, what they like or what they don’t like, what they would like to have etc.
Tell a story
There is no child that does not like to hear a good story. You can also make up a story to tell your kids just as a form of entertainment. Tell them stories that they can learn from. While doing this, you would be able to have a conversation with them because they will ask questions based on what you are saying. Remember, a good conversation is a two way process.
…to be continued
It is important to let children know that they can make it through any situation. This is where coping skills come into play. Coping skills help children get back on their feet whenever they have been under pressure.
Here are some coping skills to help guide our children
- Counting slowly upwards from 1 to 10 helps children with control and focus when they feel pressured.
Teach them to take deep breaths and exhale so hard that it can move a very light object in the room. It calms the body.
Teach them to talk to you when they feel stressed. Help them to narrow down what might have triggered the stress or pressure they are feeling. It relieves negative emotions.
Teach them to ask for help from you when issues arise. Doing this helps children know that they can turn to you for help at any time. It encourages them to talk to you about different emotions/ activities and trust that you can help them through it.
Not every child would be up for this, but dancing helps in relieving tension. It can make a huge difference for any child who chooses to do this. Dancing is a good way to boost one’s mood. It is also a lot of fun.
Using these coping skills with children can help them withstand and overcome pressure easily. But remember that each child is different and these tips might not match all personality types. Work with your child(ren) to know the best coping skills for them.
Often times we learn more by listening and observing. This helps a teacher to know and understand pupils properly. In the teaching profession observation is key. By developing this skill, you are able to understand and monitor pupils better. You know when there is a change in behaviour, when there is a change in performance, when pupils are motivated etc.
Let’s take a look at how you can easily develop this skill.
- Take a break from all your activities. Allow your mind to be in a relaxed state. Make a conscious and deliberate effort to sweep away negative thoughts. Look out for beautiful things, observe your surroundings, appreciate nature and think happy thoughts. This exercise keeps you focused and relaxed. It will also make you more conscious of your surroundings.
- See the world through the eyes of your pupils. Put yourself in their place. Children watch, learn and appreciate easily. Look for and appreciate details that stand out from each other, irrespective of what they are. Learn to walk in their shoes and see how the assimilate instructions and teachings through their eyes. When you do this often you’ll begin to see and observe things easily.
- This point is connected to the first point. Take out time to reflect on an event you witnessed or things that happen around you. When you do this, you increase your awareness level and you are able to recall. This will make you more observant and even as you teach, your illustrations will be relevant and precise.
When teachers are too busy and distracted, they never really get to know their pupils. Train your minds, slow down and you will become more aware of your pupils and their needs.
Teachers are sometimes expected to be superhuman. They are expected to KNOW IT ALL, NEVER MAKE MISTAKES, NEVER GET TIRED and NEVER HAVE BAD DAYS! This is obviously impossible, as teachers are only humans and prone to mistakes, just like the rest of us.
So, how should teachers handle mistakes during class sessions with their pupils?
When a teacher makes a mistake; though penitent, he/she shouldn’t dwell long on the mistake, but get into auto-drive to recovery from the mistake made—this makes you a better teacher over time. You learn to commit things to memory and put your improvement together in making you a better teacher.
Learning is a never ending pathway to greatness and being a teacher doesn’t grant you exclusion.
When pupils observe their teacher’s mistakes, they would most likely respond by correcting their teacher. Accept the correction without feeling incompetent, that way, you would have learnt something new and you would have taught your pupils to accept their mistakes, bounce back and be motivated to learn more.
YOU KNOW YOU’RE DOING A GOOD JOB WHEN YOUR CHILDREN ARE HAPPY AND CONTENT
This is an indicator of a child’s well-being. It shows there’s some kind of stability and predictability in the home. Children thrive in such an environment. When there’s order, it helps them focus on what they’re meant to do – which is growing, learning and developing.
We try our best as parents to do what is right for our children. Sometimes the road is tough and could also be easy. So we must take the right steps by ensuring that we act in their best interest in firmness with love, fairness, patience and honesty.
WHAT PRINCIPLES DO THEY LEARN FROM YOU?
Teaching our children good moral values to live by daily goes a long way in sharpening their behavioural patterns. Never relent on your efforts in teaching values, it often times stays with them and before long you’ll begin to see the fruits of your labour. Some children do experience difficulty, but effective and consistent parenting helps to clear the path for learning in every child.
DO YOUR CHILDREN SHARE THEIR DREAMS, THOUGHTS AND FEARS WITH YOU?
You should be a go-to mum or dad; a confidante to your children. As parents, we should build the kind of relationships with our children that will allow them to trust us and be vulnerable with us. We should always try to listen to our children no matter how insignificant the issue may be.
ARE YOU IN CHARGE OR THE CHILDREN CALL THE SHOTS?
There must be a leader in the family and it’s best if it’s an adult. As parents, we need to direct the daily activities of our children, set boundaries and help them make wise decisions.
“Children learn more from what we do, than from what we tell them to do.”
Have you ever thought about how our actions or the little things we do influence the kind of parents we are or will be? Let’s talk about that a bit and let’s see how well we are tracking.
IS THERE LOVE AND AFFECTION?
Children need to feel loved and they also want to know that they are lovable. How do we do these? We can do these through our actions and words. They need a constant reminder that they are loved. It creates in them a sense of belonging and reassurance.